Beside me u see an empty chair
I’m on an airplane
I’ve take another journey solo
I enjoyed myself
I had invited another, I had hoped he would make, it would’ve been dope had he, he didn’t
I stayed in a decent hotel with a big beautiful bed
Without him to enjoy carnal pleasures with
I beached and I love the beach and I asked strangers to photograph me because I went alone
I’ve already made solo plans in the coming months, some because I just wanted to do that bad and I didn’t want my female friends or a him to deny the good time I wanted
So I made plans.
It’s been two weeks since our last exchange
I’ve already made myself crazy thinking about it but really, fuck happened?
I wanted to call u during this layover or text u but I can’t deal with the not answering
I may have to make a sacrifice, I may have to sacrifice for male company
It’s what I want, not just any tho and To be honest, but his
But really, WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED?
I bought u something back from this solo trip, and somehow in my gut I know ur gonnna show up soon, but honestly Im worn out
I’ve worn myself out truth be told
So currently, where we are right now is a place I can’t let this happen again
I can’t give this power over anymore, so I’m taking it back
I wanna see fireworks at fourth of July
I want cookouts with u Memorial Day weekend
I want music festivals with u
I want to meet your friends
We’re too far into this year
All that being said, I prayed during this flight and the same answer as this morning.